Friday, January 06, 2006

leggo my head-snack



A neighbor has come up with a new, humane way to accessorize with fur. The jaunty red duct tape is a nice touch, don't you think? Fashion is such a delicate balance!

Other advantages to this new style:

1. Absorbs perspiration

2. Waffle-padding prevents injury, but looks more interesting than a tard-helmet

3. People will leave you alone, but

4. You're never lonely (rat-buddies)

5. There's always a snack on hand (the waffles)

In case anyone is interested in ordering one of these stunning creations, please specify head circumference and preferred tape color. Flavors are: Plain, Cinnamon-Raisin, and Maple-Walnut Swirl®. Hurry while supplies last!

23 Comments:

At 9:19 PM, Anonymous rat army said...

we hereby commandeer this love boat in the name of all rodentkind!

 
At 9:25 PM, Anonymous Luuuuurp! said...

I completely approve.

 
At 11:09 AM, Anonymous tard wannabe said...

I would like to order 3 of the creations, but I would like the traditional silver duct tape. My head circumference is 4 feet. Thank you.

 
At 11:51 AM, Anonymous Mountain Man said...

I am 5 inches around the head and would like the maple waffles and please xxxl size rat buddies. Thanks for the tip on this season's new look. You are always at the very front of the avant garde. Very post-everything.

 
At 12:02 PM, Blogger fairy butler said...

can i order mine with a syrup tube feeding line?

 
At 12:08 PM, Blogger sloth said...

FB, that is a great idea... like the hat with the beer can holders on the sides.

 
At 12:12 PM, Blogger fairy butler said...

exactly sloth. and i want my rats in uniform.

 
At 12:48 PM, Anonymous rat in paradise said...

fcuk that Aunt Jemima shit... pour the COUGH SYRUP please, NOW.

 
At 12:56 PM, Blogger sloth said...

RIP, you clearly have a problem. Please seek professional help.

 
At 12:58 PM, Blogger sloth said...

Fairy, perhaps the power of rats can be harnessed and used for one's own evil purposes...

 
At 1:07 PM, Blogger Corny said...

I'm freaking out because I've painted your neighbor and his head gear before...so has Bruegel
check out his picture
"Battle Between Carnival and Lent" in the lower left corner.. It's the waffel man!!!
I'm excited that this long standing tradition continues!!!

 
At 1:08 PM, Blogger Corny said...

http://www.wga.hu/art/b/bruegel/pieter_y/carnival.jpg

 
At 1:12 PM, Blogger sloth said...

Woah, Corny! Amazing... who knew this was traditional headgear? Is there an image of the Corny-painting you mentioned online? Would love to peep at it.

 
At 1:30 PM, Anonymous i hear voices said...

Hmmm, I may have to try this. The aluminum foil hasn't been pulling in the signals so well lately. Maybe the waffle-pockets will do a better job.

 
At 1:31 PM, Blogger Corny said...

I'll get an image of it scanned one way or another. It's called Bruegel Halloween, its a picture of demented bruegel characters trick or treating in a suburban neighborhood along with the usual ghosts and robots.

 
At 1:32 PM, Blogger sloth said...

Ha! that sounds brilliant. Must see, must see!

 
At 1:48 PM, Blogger Corny said...

rat in paradise,
a nice coctail to complement the waffles with cough syrup would be a Robitussen and purple Cool-Aid. Stir, without ice, and serve in "Old-Fashioned Glass " Garnish: No

 
At 1:54 PM, Anonymous rat in paradise said...

mmmmmm, sounds PERFECT for the waffle-dunkin'...

 
At 11:19 PM, Blogger Corny said...

sorry I had to go and make the conversation all about ME (again)... getting back to harnesing the power of rats, I'd train them to collect dandruff and make tiny but beautiful Polly Apfelbaum style instalations on my shoulders with it.

 
At 2:14 AM, Blogger sloth said...

Just saw "King Kong..." a fun ride, but many, many problems with that movie. Maybe fatal.

 
At 2:24 AM, Blogger sloth said...

corny, a sumptuous dandruff-cape would be gorgeous, snowy and velvety; I will hold this image in my brain-bone for future savoring.

 
At 12:40 PM, Blogger fairy butler said...

a dandruff cape lined with tiny bones and skulls - bits of red red meat. beautiful.

 
At 12:45 PM, Blogger sloth said...

YES, fb... and gristle! lovely.

 

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