Saint Bleph
There once was a hairy guy named Mr. Bleph. He lived in New York, where he was constantly exposed to the beautiful people, the hairless and the tanned. Bleph felt freakish in comparison, so he foolishly decided to get his back and neck waxed, just to "fit in."
The local spa takes walk-ins, so Bleph walked in. The Korean ladies all gasped in horror, and rushed him into the back room. The hot stuff was applied. It hurt like hell, and the results looked strange, as if he had been mowed in patches. So he decided to go all the way; the hairs were ripped out of his chest, his arms and legs, his ass, his scrotum, and finally, his entire head. The blood rushed to the skin and he was inflamed. His whole body itched like mad.
He jumped up off the waxing table, and ran naked out of the spa and into the Duane Reade, where he stood in the unguents aisle and smeared himself with cortisone cream, tube after tube. But it was too late. Mr. Bleph died of the itching, and was declared a saint. Let this be a lesson to you.
posted by sloth @ 11:01 PM
14 comments
14 Comments:
He sounds like a pussy man to me.
actually, it's best that he died. The grow-out would have killed him, anyway.
Celebrate hair!
Yes, although in the summer it can be beastly hot.
Thanks again Sloth. I have been contemplating the waxical treatments and this cautionary tale has helped me make up my mind.
Good, Krix. The waxical treatments are only good for small patches (refer to the image of the Guru 2 posts back, for example); any large applications will result in great pain and expense, in the experience of Sloth.
Sloth is considering a reverse mohawk, but this would be achieved with electric razors.
Slothy please to look at the before waxing picture;
http://www.bitoffun.com/weirds-Wolfman_Jack.htm
He is blotchy but no longer must shampoo face.
Pretty! This photo must have been taken after the ear-waxing.
Is this the lead singer for Midnight Oil?
PD, the baldness makes for a resemblance to Peter Garrett, who is the patron saint of 80's Australian indie rock and environmentalism, whereas Saint Bleph is the patron saint of body waxing.
Yes! That's him. They may be related.
he also resembles the mutant guy from the classic film "The Hills Have Eyes."
You are so right, Krix! Interesting. Perhaps hairlessness is not the scourge Sloth once believed. The hairless are, perhaps, just the flipside of a particular coin of being.
p.s. Krix, you rock.
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